The Etiquettes Of Marriage And Wedding
Sheikh Muhammad Naasirudden al-Albaani
that's etiquettes of Marriage And Wedding .may be summarized as follows:
Kindness toward you wife when you wish to enter into her
Placing your hand on your wife's head and praying for her
The praying of husband and wife together
What to say at the time of making love
How he should come to her
The prohibition of sodomy
Making wudhuu' between two acts with one's wife
Bathing is perferable
The bathing of husband and wife together
Making wudhuu' after sex and before sleeping
The ruling of this wudhuu'
Making tayammum in a state of janaba instead of wudhuu'
Bathing before sleeping is preferable
The prohibition of sex when she is menstruating
The penitence of one who has sex during menses
What is permissible when she is on her period
When it is allowed to resume sexual activity after menses
The lawfulness of coitus interruptus
It is preferable not to practise coitus interruptus
What the two spouses should intend with their marriage
What he should do the morning after his wedding night
The house must have a place for bathing
The prohibition of spreading bedroom secrets
The obligation of a wedding feast
The sunnah of a wedding feast
Wedding feasts can be given with other than meat
Participation of the wealthy in the feast with their wealth
The Author's Introduction
All praise is due to Allah, the One who said in the clear verses of His Book:
"And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among
yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put
love and mercy between your (hearts): Verily in that are Signs for those
who reflect".[al-Room 30:21]
May the prayers and peace of Allah be upon His Prophet Muhammad, the one who said in an authenticated hadith : "Marry the loving and fertile, for I will compete with the other Prophets with the number of my followers on the Day of Qiyama".
[Ahmad and at-Tabaarani with hasan isnaad. And declared saheeh from Anas by Ibn Hibbaan. And it has witnesses which will be mentioned in Question 19]
After this opening: There are in Islam, certain etiquettes upon anyone who marries and wishes to consummate his marriage with his wife. Most Muslims today, even those who exert themselves in Islamic worship, have either neglected or become totally ignorant of these Islamic etiquettes. Therefore, I decided to write this beneficial treatise clearly explaining these issues on the occasion of marriage of someone dear to me. I hope that it will be an aid to him and to other believing brothers in carrying out what the Chief of the Messengers has ordained on the authority of the Lord of the Worlds. I have followed that by pointing out certain issues important to every one who marries, and with which many wives in particular have been tested.
I ask Allah Most High to bring about some benefit from this treatise, and to accept this work solely for His glorious countenance. Surely, He is the Righteous, the Merciful.
It should be known that there are many etiquettes in the area of marriage. All that I am concerned with here in this quickly compiled work is that which is authenticated of the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad, that which is irreproachable from the standpoint of its chain of narration and upon which no doubt can be cast in terms of its constructions and meanings. In this way, whoever reads and follows this information will be on a clearly established basis in religion, and will have full confidence in the source and validity of his acitons. I hope for him that Allaah will put the final seal of felicity on his life, in reward for beginning his married life with the following of the sunnah, and to make for him among His slaves whose statement He has described in the Qur'an saying:
And those who pray, "Our Lord! Grant unto us wives and offspring
who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace)
to lead the righteous."
The final disposition of things is for those of pious practise, as the Lord of the Worlds said:
As to the Righteous, they shall be amidst (cool) shades
and springs (of water). And (they shall have) fruits, - all
they desire. "Eat ye and drink ye to your heart's *******:
for that ye worked (righteousness)." Thus do We
certainly reward the Doers of Good.